Posted by Anonymous on 2014/02/13 under Uncategorized
What am I even doing here? is that why you talk to him that way Now I’ve read this over and over again and it isn’t helping much. I see that Iv’e said foolish things . I do feel angry still. and i don’t know what i’ll do.
Were you just saying that so I didn’t get hurt?
I’ve always thought of you as sweet
but you’ve been bitter as dirt.
Are you really as shy as you say?
Are you Reserved?
is there anything I can say or do?
or am i just getting on your nerves?
When i see that guys face
and he’s talking to you
making you laugh
and you ask him questions too
It makes me so jealous
and yea I’m insecure from time to time
but his presence corrupts me
I would gladly punch the s*** out of him
for my own piece of mind
how dare him try and threaten me
taking the back seat with you
That was my f***ing seat you a******
though I am frustrated , I have to believe
that I still have a chance
Am i man enough?
of course i am ‘
I wish I could have squished the miserable bastard with my seat though
his sad humor makes my blood steam
If I could only tell him to back the f*** off I would
but the truth is
He’s probably not a bad guy
and that’s what pisses me off the most
I wouldn’t physically harm him
although i wish to god i would
i won’t
instated i’ll try to be amazing
and ill be amazing
I’m shy you say
I’m really really shy
Well f***, really?
am i friend zoned then?
are you saying this cause you mean it?
looking at him in the eyes
why
I’m tense
i want to break something
but i may break myself
i can sit here and keep riddling this whole thing
or I cant try to do something about it
but you’re so hard to speak to
you say your shy
and you want to get to know me better
than what the f*** have we been doing this whole time
you really think I give a s*** about our friendship?
Really?
I do, but I know that you know that i want you more than a friend
why would you meet with me on the weekends then?
am i your “gay friend”?
I don’t want to play this game anymore with you
i want you
this is f***ing bulls***
i could care less about the girls lining up at the door.
they can wait out in the cold
i only want to let you in
instead I’m sitting here
pissed the f*** off
typing away
this isn’t fun
but i know it’s not supposed to be
but its not not
its repetitive
and boring me
and I’m tense
lust? no
Love, maybe
But ill never know for sure until you get
off of your safe barrier and start acting like the woman you are
you give me statements when i need fact
how am i supposed to act like i don’t care about you?
This isn’t a game to me anymore
I deserve something other that this s***
because I’m not like every other guy
as much as that is said by every man
i know I am not
otherwise you would be meaningless to me
and i would be with the most goddess looking woman I can find
i’m not shallow
I am attracted to your intelligence
and to your child like manner
you’re a woman
but you’re as sweet as a child
and I’ve seen everything that is bitter
and tasted awful things that people said
when i met you it was like meeting a person for the first time
you say you want to wait to date
you want to get to know me better
but I’ve seen you day to day
and i know you’ve seen me too
is you’re saying what you’re saying than yeah i’ll be patient
I’m a cat above water
are you just as anxious?
you’re a friendly porcupine, and I wanna pick you up
am I that reckless kid? and you’re afraid of being crushed?
I’m covered in your needles head to toe
you want me to hold you again every time I let it go.
or do you?
I really don’t know, everything is a f***ing guess
am I just a ball of yarn
am i being a pussy?
Should I be a man and force my tongue down your throat
as if I had a gun to my head?
Is this one of my sick fantasies again?
would I be better off playing with myself in bed?
so you say you’re shy
and you haven’t dated in years
you are very weird, yes
but that’s the least of my fears
I don’t know who you take me for
but i’m not out to just get laid
and I do mean everything I say
I’m not toying with you
and I wish not to beg
even though I am begging
I’m tired and I’m fatigued
every thought I’ve had in the past few months has ended up about you somehow
and I feel like you may feel that way too
but i cant put my finger on it
and its driving me to bitterness